Today I would like to talk about how important it is to make connections with children and how you can do so. Making connections with children is so important because you start to build a relationship where that child starts to feel like they are safe with you and can be open with you. They will come to you when they're sad, hurt, angry, happy, and just want to hang out with you because they think you are amazing. Why do they think you are amazing? Well, because you took time to build a trusting relationship with them. This pertains to all family members and caregivers who just take time out to spend time investing in a childs life.
Principle #1: Time In
You spend time in when you the time out of your day to recognize the child. Maybe you recognize they aced a test in a subject they struggle in, take time to say hey you work so hard on this test and you did fabulous, I'm so proud of you! Maybe you give them a pat on the back or a high five too. Maybe your childs soccor team lost at a game, but you recognize they had a good team spirit, make them hear and see how proud you are of it. Greet each child in the morning and ask how they're doing. At night you can ask how their day went.
Principle #2: Put it in Writing
Isn't it wonderful when you get a thank you note, I'm thinking of you note, or a get better card? Well kids like them too! So take time to write a note to a student or child of your own. You can put it in their mailbox, put it in their pencil box, leave it on their desk or bed, post it on their bathroom mirror, or put it on their lunch sack (money). You can write to them about how you hope they have a great day or how proud you are of them. I still have a letter from my mom from while I was at camp in 6th grade. I was so happy when my name was called at mail time! It really does help a child feel like you care for them.
Principle #3: Make Sacrifices
If you are a teacher this may look like you coming in early to prepare the days materials and then taking time to really invest in the kids in your class when you would normally be working on preparing the next activity. Parents that might mean you take a individual child out and just hang out doing what they want to. children will see the sacrifices we make and it will make them feel special.
Principle #4: Talk Positively About Children to others
Whether they are around or not speak positively about children. Other children may overhear, that child might actually be listening without your knowledge, and iit's gossip especially if it's not your own child. As parents and or teachers there will be things you will need to talk about your kids that aren't always positive, but that doesn't mean you can't end it positively or with a game plan to help that child succeed. What you focus on you get more of.
Principle #5: Connect before you Correct
Really get to know the child before you resort to correcting them. Talk to them, play with them in interest areas, do things with them that they enjoy doing, and do things with them that are unique and different from things you do with the other children.
Principle $6: Class/Family meeting
Take time out to bring everyone together and just chat. Maybe in class that looks like show and tell, talking about a question of the day, and focusing on what others want to share with the classs. At home that might look like a game nigh, family dinner with no technology, going to do a activity together, or just sitting around and talking.
Children and adults of all kind thrive for community and relationships with others. It's the adults job to create and show children what a healtghy and caring relationship looks like. So go out and make a connection with your kids at home and in school!
Resource:
If you want to learn about more ways to make connections with kids and the benefits of it look into getting the book: 101 Principles for Positive Guidance With Young Child Building responsive Teachers by Katharine C. kersey and Marie L. Masterson. All that I talked about above came from this book.